Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Had a bit of interesting experience this morning.

In my first class we were talking about Freud and I finally understood his concept of how civilization is just the ego of society but that it causes all the problems it seeks to fix. It seemed leave no room for improvement on the human condition. I don't like that.

So I left feeling uneasy already,and then go to my next class Science and Politics (it's a philosophy class) we were talking about sex education and how to do it right and I finally realized that we can't. Just plain can't. And I started thinking about all the other problems in the world and realized that all the morally correct answers will get us no where and every solution that could get us somewhere sacrifices our humanity and so basically that's all i could focus on for the rest of class couldn't think of anything else. It was like paralysis for the mind.

I kept thinking that I was in the wrong place, I shouldn't be here, in this classroom. I should be out in the world figuring out what the most important problems are and how to fix them, or just zoning out for a while.

So I took Candide's advice and tended to a garden.

I think I've just stowed away all of that crap in the back of my mind, and now it's lurking...

I was talking with a friend back a couple of months ago on a particularly foggy night. We were discussing society and it seems that you must escape reality for a time to really live, and yet you can't escape because it forces you into submission. Kinda the Freud thing all over again...

Some days I just want to go. No plan, just go and do whatever the hell I want. Go to Mexico, just live on the beach or something, escape. I don't think I could do it alone though.

Anyone who wants to go on a crazy adventure that you just give an indeterminate part of your life (possibly all of it) to apply here!

I'm gonna go tune out to some Dark Side of the Moon now, gain a little perspective.

I'll talk about my great fear of time sometime else.


p.s. I started a new blog for my academic/political writings. It's here.


  1. u need a vacation...........and a bf..........

  2. God don't I know it. Good thing summer is soon.

  3. matt

    i am not sure about us totally getting alonfg with your politics but what good taste in music

    ticking away the moments that make up a dull days hours ...

    kickiing around on a piece of ground in your home town

    yea that song is going to make you feel better lol

    but finish school first so you are prepared to enter this world

    take care and be safe


  4. So after reading this post last night it got me thinking about a lot of stuff and gave me something to write about on my blog. I def understand what you mean...