Monday, August 31, 2009


Once again I have failed when it comes to logic boy, who by the way has apparently broken his arm as he was wearing a cast.

However by far the biggest disappointment was this: he was talking to the guy next to him. Basically, if I had been able to sit next to him I would have had some interaction. But no, this ugly guy sits right next to me (literally, no courtesy seat or anything) and i'm stuck looking at the boy taking over my mind chatting it up with the guy next to him that should have been me. *Epic sad face*

On the other hand, this opens up opportunities for me, perhaps, if it's not too late. I just need to get to class after he does, and sit next to him. Hopefully he's not too buddy buddy with the guy he was talking to today or else if that has solidified I'm pretty much fucked. :/

Oh well. Wednesday is eagerly awaited.

By the way, this is officially my first post made and published away from home. I'm at the Union Building here at my university. Go me.

The guy who was dressed really cute today too,

Matt :(

Sunday, August 30, 2009

The One With the Cross-Dresser and Fun Times

So this weekend has been crazy.

On Friday I was all set to talk to logic boy. He comes in the room, looks like he's about to sit next to me again, and what does he do? Sits right directly behind me. Damnit. Needless to say a conversation would have been insanely awkward if I did make it, so I'm hoping for better luck tomorrow.

Saturday though, crazy day. In short, went out and about downtown with my friend Brent, with whom I go on my crazy adventures with. Well he see's his friend "Big Gay Tony," as he introduced him to me. haha wow what a character. Dressed like a girl, in leather bondage looking stuff. Hair that was huge and just. Wow. Really cool guy though, ended up hanging out with him the rest of the day. Went to the Pride Center here in Salt Lake for a bit. Omg, there was a boy there, Pablo, who was really cute. He was wearing really small shorts too which was just the icing on the cake. It was fun though, we all played cards and such and just hung out. Then we left and went to Tony's apartment (which he shares with his boyfriend) and it was really fun. There's more about other interesting people we met along the way but I can't be bothered to type it all. haha. sorry.

Today I made up (not out! pervs) with an friend with whom I've had sort of a falling out over the summer. We talked for a good 4-5 hours and we're on good terms now. Yay for reconciliation!

Well hopefully things will go well with Logic boy tomorrow.

Talk to you later folks,


Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The Beginning of Logic Boy

So Tuesday I mentioned something about a boy in my logic class. Well I had that class again today, and Oh My God. I think I'm falling in love. He walked in and immediately my heart went *boomph* right up into my throat. It stayed there while he walked over to my row and sat two desks away to my right. God he's wonderful.

I think I should probably try to talk to him Friday... haha yeah i'm falling for a boy i've never talked to, nor do I know his name. I dunno what to say though! Help me please!

Oh yeah somehting else kinda odd happened today. So I was in the Union Building lounging around on a couch perving at the cute boys walking around the job fair, when this random guy comes up and starts asking me about my guitar and what i'm reading and stuff. It was a really awkward conversation cause he didn't leave but didn't have much to say. Eventually he wanted to see my guitar (actually he wanted to play it too but I wasn't about to let a stranger touch my guitar). So I pulled it out and started playing a bit. Well then this chick comes up and is interested too. So I come up with the excuse "I've got to go eat lunch," and so I left and went downstairs to the food court. Who should I see?


I lost my appetite right there, I just wanted more of him...

Sigh, Friday is soon enough, yet so far away...


P.S. really, what should I say?!

Wild Raunchy College Sex

... in my mind...

Haha so classes have been going well. Yesterday was a looong day though. I got to campus and my first class was American History. Eh whatever, technically I could clep out of the class because I took AP Am His in high school, but I figured I like history enough to take it again. But also! There was a boy that came in and sat next to me. (by the way, as nice as that is, it's also obnoxious because you can't sit and perv at them unnoticed) I think he might have been checking me out too. Like he looked like he could potentially be gay. He was wearing shorts, a t-shirt and a button up vest unbuttoned. He was kinda cute too. I just sorta got "the vibe" from him though.

Next class, writing. I have had the professor before and she is wonderful (the whole reason for taking a class from her again). I'm quite excited because it will force me to write more, which I really do enjoy doing.

Finally I had a class in Gender and Sexuality. It looks like it's going to be an interesting class as well. But again, there was this boy. I could have sworn he was looking over at me and such. At one point, I uncrossed my legs and he did the same just after, haha I don't know what that means but take note! Anyway, I have another friend in that class who could act as a wingman if I wanted her to (in fact she's already suggested it).

It was a lot of running up and down campus though. I had 20 min. max in between classes that were on opposite sides of campus. Oy vey.

Also my course load looks like it will be pretty big, so I may have to stop reading blogs. I'll try not to stop posting because I like to do that, but reading others may become difficult as it does take a great deal of time. But fear not I shall warn you if that becomes the situation.

Well I'm off to Wednesday's classes. Bringing a guitar on the bus will be interesting...


Monday, August 24, 2009

It's Raining Boys

Oy I really shouldn't be up writing this but what the hell.

First day back to school. Awesome.

It's like a treasure trove of cute boys up there. Marvelous really. In my logic class (which may end up being a pain in my ass, math geeks I may be calling for help) there was this really cute boy, shaggy-ish hair brown, glasses, super cute. In my guitar class, there was a pretty cute boy, blonde, a bit more stylish. But good god, everywhere, they were everywhere. Cute boys wherever you look.

Don't have much else to say really. It's good to be back.


Sunday, August 23, 2009

Last day of summer...

was spent cleaning and rearranging my room.


Ah well it needed to be done.

12 years of being in the same room with the same arrangment and same clutter was a bit too long. So I got rid of a ton of stuff and moved my furniture around.

I like it so far.

School starts tomorrow though. :(

I don't know why I'm not excited for school like I usually am. (yeah I know I'm a nerd sometimes) However, when I went to buy books the other day (5 for $238, not too shabby)I got a cup of coffee and just sat outside the union building and enjoyed the view. I did feel nice to be there. I love the college campus. It's one of my favorite places in this city. I wish I could live there this year. Maybe in the spring... probably not though.

Oh well. Work is going to be scaled back starting this week as well. No more working mondays! Whoo! But that only means that I work from 2-9 or so on tuesdays. Blegh. The rest of the week isn't too bad, but still. Oh well.

Oh yeah! I bought a computer! It's in the mail. I hope it gets here soon. 13 inch Macbook Pro. Squwee! I'm so excited for it!

Well I think that's it. Hopefully I'll have time to blog during school with work and all that. We'll see how much I'll be able to.

Here's to a good school year!


Wednesday, August 19, 2009


Nothing to talk about really.

So random responses.

Torchy, a while back you said I should just get in there and talk to Jarret. It's not that simple. You see to get into that room, first of all you have to change shoes, or put on shoe covers. Then wash your hands. Then put on gloves, then a lab coat, and then you're good to go. Besides I don't really have much reason to be in there except Tuesdays and Fridays when I mop in there, but that's only after everyone has left. I rarely even see him in the halls because he's always in that lab.

Ethan, I said maybe pink maybe! Haha and so what if my socks are pink.

Why am I the only homo around here who knows his musicals? Even I'm not that good either, but sheesh guys. Do your homework.

Wow that was like a random very choosy comment reply, oh well.

Cute boy!

Oh by the way This is a pretty hep cat. Pretty cool guy so far, so check him out if you haven't yet. The mysterious "M"



Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Baadoop Ba doo wop diddy.

So not much to talk about.

Updated my links. If you've got a problem just lemme know.

Also, all my pointz belong to Ken from Adjusting Myself, who correctly answered my questions. The rest of you homo's got some s'plainin to do.

Um... not much else. Oh! I want to go buy a bunch of white no show socks (or the low cut or whatever they are) and dye them different colors. I like the low cut for how they fit and all that but the plain black and white are just soo boring. So here are the colors I would ideally love to have: lime green, yellow, baby blue, orange, red, regular type green, and hell maybe even pink. We'll see how the fabric dye suppliers can comply with my wishes. Oh and any advice would be appreciated.

I suppose I'll leave you today with some videos cause I got nothing else to post on...

Really weird and depressing, watch at your own risk!

A more upbeat song, gotta love Carole King!

Even more upbeat! Man he's good, and cute! Why is the southern hemisphere full of talented cute boys?

That's all folks!


Sunday, August 16, 2009

Match Maker Match Maker Make Me a Match…

So I had a completely awesome time yesterday.

Had to go to work for a few hours which wasn’t as bad as you would think because basically I was getting paid to just be there in case the contractors needed anything (they were doing work on the building). They didn’t need much.

Then I went clothes shopping with my friend Brent and this kid David (who’s only 15 but it seems like he’s much older) who’s from Brazil. That was fun, we stuck to thrift stores because they have weird stuff that’s cool. I bought a new shirt (maybe I’ll post of a picture of it). It’s a western style shirt and it’s pretty rad.

Then we decided to make dinner. So we went to the store and got the ingredients and here’s what we cooked. Jamaican Jerked Chicken (which I grilled perfectly (it was my first time grilling chicken)) with a rice pilaf with sautéed mushrooms and havarti cheese (really rich but sooo good) and grilled onions and red bell peppers. We also had a French baguette and some extra havarti cheese with grapes for an appetizer.

Then we went for coffee afterwards. There’s this cafe run by the Pride Center here and it’s actually a really cool place so that’s where we went. Talked with some random people, laughed a lot, had a good time. Then I drove David home and Brent and I went to go have a fire in my fire pit in my backyard.

All in all a good day.

Oh yeah, my title. Brent said that his girlfriend knew a guy (named Jake) who she might be able to hook me up with. And he said another person he knew knew someone who could possibly be hooked up with me. Point being, I may be getting hooked up soon. *Squee!*

Oh and 150 points to whomever can tell me what musical that title is from.

And additional 200 points will be awarded to the person who can tell me which character is the “matchmaker.”


Sorry is my gay showing?



Thursday, August 13, 2009

I've Died and Gone To Retro Geek Heaven.

So I'm sitting here on my 5 yr old laptop, using the 10 yr old internet, playing on my gameboy color from the 1990s (the purply kind that are see through), listening to my record player that's decades old technology (although i have to get up and flip it over now... grr) all while txting on a year old phone.

Life is good.


Wednesday, August 12, 2009

What a Night

So things were going well tonight. Work was fine. I was in the building where Jarret wasn't so my perv levels were able to return to normal. Oy vey, he's gorgeous. Got off, went to a friends Mission Call opening (Mormon thing, don't worry about it). Went and had coffee with my friend Matt, whom I told about Jarret. Didn't talk about everything I wanted to with him (talked a lot about work though, Oy) but it was nice anyway.

Then went to the store. That's when things went, awry.

Car battery was dead when we returned to the car, so we push started it, which worked for all of 500 yds at the most then the engine would cut out like it was gonna die and then bust back into life. Well I drove up into a neighborhood near by and drove around hoping the engine would just pop back into full life. Well it didn't. It died.

I know exactly what's wrong. The alternator is bad. I was going to call on getting it replaced tomorrow (thank god for lifetime warrentee's (sp?)) but now the car is in a neighborhood miles away. I'll probably have to get it towed to the autoshop. It didn't help that its a fairly upscale neighborhood and the people around probably didn't appreciate teenagers hanging around casing their joints. My dad finally picked me up and I'll have to deal with it in the morning.

Plus I have to go to work earlier tomorrow. Plus my internet was being incredibly dumb earlier.

However, I have my Carole King record spinning on the turntable and I am calm and sedated now.

God what a night.


Dream – Dream Boy

So I had and remembered a disturbing dream this morning.

I was in a hotel room and every night two people were killed, and somehow i was able to see a scene from the slayings and it was always of blood and bleach being mixed into a big graduated cylinder. But when they surveyed the rooms afterward there were these huge messes. And I remember they got one of my friends and her mom and it was a most horrible scene.

It was the closest thing I've had to a nightmare in a while, but wasn't really terrifying so much as disturbing as they didn't come after me at all.

Hmm... :/ Oh well.

Next order of business, Dream Boy. Well actually his name is Jarret. He works at my work. He's fairly new. We have this lab that has all theses windows looking into it from the hallway which i travel through fairly frequently, he works in this lab. When I say frequently I mean like constantly, all day, everyday. He's not usually what I go for, but man is he sexy. Reddish blond hair that's just a perfect shag, he's stylish, really sexy legs (and I'm not all that into legs) and a really hot body. Like drool.

It's getting to be a problem though, I'm like obsessed with passing by that lab. I have to catch a peek whenever I can and sometimes I have to just look away so I don't seem creepy or anything.

And omg! The other day he was laughing and smiling at what I presume was a funny conversation in the lab and as I walk by he turns and looks at me with the smile still on his face. Omg I almost lost it. I had to keep all my composer until I was out of sight where I just beemed and giggled a little. God I'm such a girl sometimes. haha.

Then there was the time I was in that lab watching the repair men that were in there, and Jarret walks in to do some stuff, and I just kept perving on him. Finally he left, and I just sat and day dreamed about... compromising situations with said employee...

Haha well I hope you enjoyed this random here's how things are post. I quite enjoy doing these. And because I haven't in a while.


Cute Boys!


 seez-0008 seez_205 sitinthegrass_500

Top Left: Look at that beautiful hair. Top Right: haha I dunno why but I just enjoy the picture. Bottom: Awww sweeetums.

Hell they all had amazing hair, Mboy you’re welcome.


Oh and thanks for the comments on the look of the blog. Yes it is very white, yes I did sorta subconsciously copy you Dan (but I have a header picture dammit!) and I’m sorry if it hurts anyone’s eyes. In looking for a new layout I became frustrated when I couldn’t fine what I wanted (cause i honestly didn’t really know) I just went for simplicity. Here you go.



Off to enjoy another day as a working class citizen, oh joy.



P.S. I’m probably gonna get a new computer soon! Squee! So maybe expect some cool new content eventually.

Monday, August 10, 2009

100 - Yippee Skippy

So here I am, post number 100.

Perhaps this little break that i've taken will help restore my blogging mojo.

Oh yeah, notice anything different?

New layout! Hooray!

What do you all think of it?

I think I'll get back to regular morning posts starting tomorrow. We'll see.

I think that's about it for this post.

Haha wow I thought i was gonna do something special...

oh well.


Tuesday, August 4, 2009

What About Bob - The Finale

Ok here's the last of the questions answered. Thanks again to Bob for sending all these! :D

61. If you had a message to live share with the world what would it be? Don't let this whole living thing get to you. Somethings you have to take seriously, like a job, not like work, but a task. When you have a task to complete take it seriously, but everything else? Naw, it's not all that important.

62. Name two qualities of character you possess? A good work ethic and compassion.

63. Name two qualitites of character you admire in others? A good work ethic and compassion. haha. I hate it when people are too lazy to jump in and help when something needs to be done.

64. I have read you are an agnostic now and I believe that is a reasonable belief to hold though not one I share, would you like to explain why it is you believe God doesn't exist? Whoa whoa, I never have claimed that. I believe somethings are simply beyond human comprehension, God included. Perhaps there is a God, but one I can worship? Or need to? Maybe not. I'm not going to spend my life worrying about God and all that. That being said, I dislike militant atheism as much as I dislike militant theism. It's all the same. I believe in the absurdity of life.

65. What do you want your readers to understand about you from your blog? I dunno, whatever they want to. I'm an open book (with a few sticky pages).

66. Would you like to adopt children in the future? Well I would like to yeah, but it would depend on who I choose to go through life with as well.

67. Do you believe there is a stereotypical gay person? Well yes. In fact, his name is George and he lives at 432 E. Winchester Road Memphis Tennessee. He's quite the flamer, they keep having to fix his wrist and put out his house because his track lighting lights the elaborate lace curtains on fire.

68. Do you believe the media still portrays gays in a stereotypical manner? Well the news papers generally don't from what I can see and I never watch T.V. news so I can't comment on that too much.

69. What do you think a person your age can do to support gay rights and groups if htey are closeted? Get some liberal friends, then it won't seem so odd. Lol.

70. If I visited Utah where would you suggest a blogger would want to go and see? Downtown Salt Lake City, wonderful little city, well it will be when the goddamn construction gets finished.

71. If you left Utah where would you want to go live and why? Well it changes all the time, but currently Seattle Washington because I like the ocean, and the mountains, and the rain and guess what? It seems to have that all pretty close.

72. What makes Utah a great place to live? The wilderness just at our back porch. Seriously, I can be in complete wilderness in less than an hour. It's amazing like that.

73. What makes Utah a bad place to live? The Utah Legislature.

74. In general how are gays treated in society in Utah? It seems as if we've made a bit of a niche for ourselves. There are still strongholds of ignorance and bigotry (see The Church and the Utah Legislature (often confused as the same thing lol)), but they are cracking. I hope.

75. Gay Marriage or Civil Unions where are you on this issue and what if anything does Utah have to allow gay partners to be recognized? Civil Unions are a nice start, but according to US law it's gotta be Marriage. 14th Amendment, separate but equal is not acceptable. That's it in a nutshell. In Utah certain municipalities allow partners to register for a benefits registry that's sorta a pseudo civil union.

76. Is it safe to be out as a gay person in Utah? Well as personal safety is concerned, I would say so.

77. The Mormon Church Officials run the state of UTah basically is what I have, is that true in your opinion? They do have a great deal of power, but to say they run the place is a bit out there.

78. What is your opinion if any about a democratic political system being run or heavily influenced by a sole church? It doesn't work. Gotta protect that minority! :D

79. If you know what is the Mormon position on gays and is different than other religions that you are aware of? Well as a disclaimer, I am not Mormon and so I can't know for certain but I believe the general idea is that as long as you remain celebate you're sorta ok. But then if you can overcome your homosexuality (*cue eye rolling here*) then you can marry and have kids and be a good mormon. I think the celebicy part is common to a lot of churches though.

Ok Cheeky time, young un's turn away!

80. Ever had sex with a large stuffed animal? Hmm... can't say that I have *cough cough cough*

81. Who was your first crush on and when was it? In elementary school I had the biggest crush on this girl named Wendy. Whoo...

82. Did you taste it? Umm... sure.

83. When you are looking at a guy what do you check out first? Face quickly followed by shoes.

84. What turns you off in another? haha bad shoes.

85. What if anything is an immediate visual turn on to you in another? Nudity? sure that sounds reasonable.

86. Ok do you enjoy wanking to pictures, videos, or memories? Both, and do fantasies count? If so then those too.

87. Have you ever been naked in public, where, when and why? Nope :/

88. Strangest place you have ever wanked? In my car going 80 MPH on Highway 89.

89. Most number of times in a day you have wanked? 6.

90. If you could choose anyone who would you like to be in a porn movie with? Just one? and I'll just assume porn stars here. Umm... Tommy Anders and Jesse Star. Let's go with them two.

91. Do you have a fetish? Shoes.

92. Where is his favorite place to jerk off? New and exciting places.

93. Does Matt jerk off everyday? Almost every day yeah.

94. I read that Matt only uses his right hand to jerk off but what would Matt do if he broke his right hand to relieve himself? First of all , that is simply lies and slander, I treat both hands equally in the fun that is wanking.

95. Has anyone else ever touched Matt's member, and who was it? Yes, my cousin. Yeah yeah weird fuck I am, but it was years ago and we were both young and curious.

96. Have you ever dated anyone and give details? Yes I have had one relationship in my life. Details are in an early post entitled "Tired of Being Alone"

Whoo all done.

Now I have to do something special for post 100!

... shit

I have no idea what to do! Comment and let me know! Cause I won't make another post until I get a good idea.



P.S. Posted earlier today, go check it out.

Update On Coming Out

So I'm sorry I kinda left you all hanging. It's just that I've told this story many times over to people on msn and such and so I just didn't want to bother writing it again for here.

So I'm going to copy it from a conversation I had. Haha.

so yesterday
i got the idea to come out stuck in my mind
so i eventually told my mom
and she was asking things like are you sure? how do you know? have you ever been with a guy? stuff like that
well we talked for a little and then went our seperate ways
well i guess she took it a lot harder than she was leading on
sorry msn was being dumb
she basically broke down when my dad got home i guess, i was down in my room the whole time
and so my dad comes down to talk to me and he's close to tears which is weird cause i've never seen him like that, but he's like try to act normal around the family tonight
oh yeah
great timing on my part
my family was coming over for a birthday bbq for me
so i say sure
well my mom got all boozed up as the evening went on, and she told my aunt and my other uncle and who knows who else
which i guess was alright because it saves me the hassle of having to do it
but anyway
my aunt talked to me for a while
she was really supportive and awesome
i'm a bit pissed at my mom for being so childish and drinking her problems away and my dad, eh i dunno
but i think they really over reacted cause it's not like i'm any different
they should be happy that i shared something for once lol
but yeah today i've kinda just avoided them and i'm holed up in my room
but yeah that's about it
i'm making a quilt out of old t-shirts now

The quilt from t-shirts I'm still working on as I have forgotten how to sew.

But yeah that's what happened in a nutshell.

And that was from yesterday, so today I got home and my mom is acting as if nothing happened, which is good i guess because so am I.

But yeah that's that.


P.S. I'll be working on the final set of questions right after I post this, and then I'll post that, so be sure to read and comment on both of them, kthxbai!

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Ah Fuck

Goddamn I have a way with timing.

Told my mom today.

She put on a brave face.

She told my dad.

He kept his brave face, but it was cracking.

Both are really upset though I can tell.

It would be a whole lot better if I could stay holed up in my room until tomorrow, but nOooOooo I had to tell her on the day that we have the family over for a BBQ. Jesus Christ I'm good!

This is gonna be awkward I can already tell.

Shit shit shit, what the hell did I do.

Oh well.

Come what may.

It's time to start living.



Saturday, August 1, 2009

Oh yeah....

*shuffle shuffle*

Oh hi there.

I guess it was pointed out to me that I forgot to mention that yesterday (July 31st) was my birthday. Whoops.

I'm 19, yay me!

Questions will be finished later today. Going to the thrift store now :D