Friday, November 26, 2010

Happy Belated Thanksgiving!

Howdy howdy,

Happy Thanksgiving (a day late)!

Though I didn't actually make it home to celebrate with family in Utah, I did have a wonderful thanksgiving here in Washington all the same. One turkey cooked to perfection (and defrosted in under 24 hours in an impressive battle of wills), roasties (roasted potatoes, delicious!), succotash, pies, gravy, wine, cider, wonderful! I was the token American at this feast, with a German (from Portugal originally), three Brits, an Australian, and a Korean. All in all, a fantastic meal with fantastic people.

Other than that... What else have I been up to...

Well it snowed in Seattle, like an actually impressive snowstorm. This city can't deal with snow though, let me tell you. I was driving to the airport with my friend Holly to pick up her friend. Well, we never made it to the airport. In fact it took up 8 hours to get home from a drive that should take an hour to and hour and a half in somewhat heavy traffic. We ended up sitting for about 5 hours in a jam to last a lifetime. It was pretty pathetic.

I have been fairly depressed lately though, not today or yesterday for the most part but this past week hasn't been that great. It's more a generalized depression, up and downs and such. I've been lonely and wanting a relationship and that coupled on not being able to go home for the holidays and having snow and everything just wasn't a good combination.

Whelp, I should get started on some homework now, the house is pretty empty these days which is nice, come Sunday when everyone gets back from whence they went it'll liven up around here.

Thanks to Steve for being the sole commenter on my last post.



Matt

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Unforgetable

Is it a sign of wasted youth to look back on one's adolescent life with fond memories towards points in one's life where you pine away for someone in an unrequited fashion? When all of your romantic memories remain one-sided and ultimately unfulfilling, and yet remembering the moments of how that love consumed your thoughts and attention bring such joy.

Once again, I am profoundly lonely.

Sure I have friends without whom I would be completely hopeless, and yet I have no one to call my own, to mess with my hair, to love me in return. I know in the back of my mind that one day my ship will come in, but even further live fears that it may not.

Today I went for a walk to the library to do some printing. I was not met by a love for the ages, nor by someone to take away the cold. I remained as I have traditionally been, alone.

Just some thoughts on my mind tonight,


Matt

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Attention!!

My messenger has changed from mr_matt_iiv@hotmail to rhythymchanges@hotmail.com Please update you're addressbooks and add me there if you want to talk to me.

Thanks all,


Matt

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Forks Explained

So to those who are confused about Forks, let me explain.

Forks is a small town on the Washington Peninsula made famous by Stephanie Meyer, author of the Twilight book series. It's nothing really special, but it was fun just for the cheese factor of it all.

Otherwise, I'm too tired to do any proper blogging tonight, so I'll just give you some pictures from my trip.














Matt

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Holy Saint Jesus This is Big!

I'm going to Forks! :P


Matt

Thursday, November 4, 2010

PRO-Crastinator!

Oh yeah, I remember why I blog...

To get out of doing actual work!

I'm actually pretty caught up on homework, just need to do some reading for American History, I have a quiz section tomorrow, which is basically a discussion group that happens once a week. I also have to study for my Urdu class.

Oh yeah, I'm learning Urdu. It's a language spoken in Pakistan and northern India, spoken like Hindi and written like Arabic. I actually love it so far. It's tough but really cool.

My other class (I LOVE having only three classes, quarter system ftw!) is a course in 20th Century Russian history which has been really interesting so far but sooo much reading (I read a book in two days this week). I'm at the point where I'm hopelessly behind and have no chance of reading everything, which is fine, I don't really need to, just what is necessary for discussions in class.

School in general is busy busy busy, but pretty good.

My housing situation in Seattle is amazing though! I'm in a 'residence hall' but I use the term loosely as it is university housing but it's an actual house just across the street from campus. It's on Greek Row and it used to be a frat house, but now it's been converted into a dorm by the uni. I did get stuck with the tiniest room in the house, but my room mate is pretty cool, he's an exchange student from Japan. I love most of my housemates though! My favorite three are Laura who lives across the hall, Holly, who is from England and has the most adorable girlfriend that she's left there, and Alanna, who is Australian, a radical feminist, and just an amazing person overall. There are some other wonderful people as well, the Caitlin's, Cherry, James and Tyson. Then there's the Natalia and David, both of whom I do not like at all. David is crude, lewd, and a general wanker. Natalia is ditzy, messy, and not a particularly pleasant individual.

Anyway, that's enough catching up of background information.

Love life (what you all really want to know about)? Nonexistent. I haven't been on a single date while I've been here. Sad I know. Part of the problem is that I don't know where to meet people, and I haven't really established any friendships in the community that could lead to any setups. I've thought about Isaac a good deal while I've been here, I'm still not all the way over him, but it's well manageable by now. There is an absolutely ADORABLE British boy that comes around the house every now and then as he's a friend of Holly and Alanna. His name is Conner and he's soo cute, but unfortunately as far as I can tell straight, which confuses my gaydar just a bit as he's quiet and reserved and gives off just a slight vibe, but I well convinced it's nothing.

Anyway, this has been a proper update into my life.

Fuck whatever I said in my last post, I'm doing this for me again.

*RANT TIME DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR MY WHINING*

I do have to say it pisses me off a little that Dan get's ten comments after his post and I get two. Granted my last post was a bit highbrow, but it's something that I genuinely love to talk about and want to hear others thoughts on it. It's at times like this when I wonder who's reading, I know I'm not that popular but christ, I want that active support base that everyone else seems to have.

*RANT OVER*

Ok, you're all probably better off not reading my rant, but you know the story, my blog, my thoughts etc etc.

I think at this point this post has gone on for far too long.


So long!


Matt

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

What Queer Means to Me

So here's a comment I posted in response to this post here.



"Queer" as I most often use it, is an umbrella term for anything that could be considered different from the "norm," especially with regards to sexuality and gender expression. It is a reclaimed word, yet it is more than that. It is another way to identify along with homosexual, bisexual, gay, lesbian, etc etc. I for one do not like the term homosexual, I think it's almost offensive, or at the very least sterile, medical, and very limiting. I don't like bisexual for the very same reason.

I choose to identify as "queer" precisely because I don't want to be associated with a label. Without going into the specifics (for it's far too complicated and confusing and I have only a cursory knowledge of it) Queer theory developed as a response to LGBT Studies, which worked to say that LGBT identified individuals were just like the rest of "normal" society. Queer theory proposes the opposite, everyone is a bit "queer." Queer theory works to show that everyone is a bit different and in those differences we can see our shared humanity, we're all just as different from the "norm" (and who knows what that really is) as anyone else. For me, being queer means that I can love who I want regardless of their gender expression and orientation and they can love me and it's ok. If they person happens to be a girl, cool, a guy, a-ok, someone outside the gender norm (i.e. gender-queer) awesome.

All this being said, I understand how the word still has a lot of hurt and anger buried within it. I wouldn't go around calling everyone queer, and wouldn't want someone to call me that without knowing who I am.

I choose to be "queer" no one else. Likewise, no one can tell me I'm not queer, for that is taking my identity out of my hands.

Perhaps once we realize that we are all unique in our shared humanity, these artificial dichotomies in society will melt away, that's getting a bit ahead of things, but I can dream eh?

Anyway, that's my counter-rant.


Interestingly enough though, after coming to Seattle, I feel much more "gay" than queer. I think it comes from being put in an environment where I'm not surrounded by the community I'm used to. I feel like most people wouldn't have a clue what I mean by queer, and so it's almost easier to just say gay. Actually, sometimes it's like that at home come to think of it, and I've heard other friends say the same thing.


Anyhow, here's another post for y'all.

Please let me know what you think. It's hard to motivate oneself to post when it feels like you're talking to a blank wall (which isn't entirely true as there are some folks who do comment (thank you!)). At this point I'm not blogging for my sake. I don't NEED to be here.

That being said, I do WANT to stay, but I'd also like to know what YOU all want to hear. Posting will be erratic, understand that I am a very busy college student, and getting the energy to write is hard.


Anywho,


Matt

Monday, November 1, 2010

Hmm...

Hi there all,

I guess I should write something here.

So where have I been?

Busy with school, life, existence.

I don't know what else to really write about. Lately I haven't been terribly motivated to blog.

Overall life is good.

Not sure when I'll get back into the swing of things, but we'll see.


Anyway, until next time,


Matt